So here we are, mostly because I was getting tired of that picture post. It was stupid and mostly done out of laziness.
I've been employed and will be starting work on Monday. Which is a good thing. Money is always good. So my issues with being a bum are over. I still am terribly lonely. Having but one friend where I live is horrible. And realizing I'm not going back to E.C. was a painful realization. It's scary frankly. Not getting ready, not being excited to see the people I consider family. Knowing it's going to be a long time before I get to hug any of them. Or have demented conversations with them.
I've never actually felt this lonely before. I'm so good at socializing and making friends usually. But something about having not been here for about four years, makes me feel like the new kid a school again. I'm awkward and just silent.
It'll be worse on Monday. But what can I do?
So
job (check)
friends (a single check) [[and I love her for still being my friend]]
Happiness
I'll get there. Hopefully. I mean, there is always surprisingly hope.
“If you know someone who’s depressed please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation, depression just is, like the weather. Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest and best things you will ever do.”
— Stephen Fry
To all my friends.
